I’ve had multiple readers email in and ask about what the hell to talk about with girls in between the open and the close and it’s a great question.
Much has been written about opening girls and closing them, but what about the middle ground?
In today’s post I’m dropping practical step-by-step info you can start using today on how to ramble with girls.
Girls Approaching You
When a girl approaches you it may be less direct and most guys are terrible at reading signals that girls will send out.
A common opening from a girl is a comment on your physicality, your hairstyle, or your clothes.
Even if the girl says something in a teasing manner, it’s generally her way of a backwards compliment.
One opener that’s quite common that I get due to suiting up is, “Why are you dressed up?”.
Since most people in Los Angeles dress like slobs, it’s easy to stand out when suited up.
My common response is, “Why are you dressed down?”, or “I didn’t know they let girls in the club wearing flats” (if they are, which is unfortunately more common than not on the West Coast), followed by a playful smirk.
This establishes from the get go that you can go tit for tat with their sarcasm.
Another way girls will open a guy is through a comment on their hairstyle.
If you are rocking a nice style, then don’t be surprised if you get opened with, “I like your hairstyle”.
My go to response?
“Your hair isn’t too bad either”.
What this does is establish you as superior to her when executed properly.
You’re not being spiteful when you say it, it’s more of a dry humor comment.
The girl will usually laugh and then say something like, “You’re such an asshole”, or “Mr. Cocky huh?”.
Doesn’t matter what she says, the door has been opened for you to continue bantering with her.
Obviously, unless you look like a male model, you’ll be approaching more than you get approached, but be aware of when a girl is opening you, because it can and does happen.
Even a broke clock is right twice a day.
The key is to recognize it when it’s happening and know how to take it from there.
Whether you’ve been approached or you approached, here’s some go-to lines that I use to keep the conversation flowing, remembering that it’s less about WHAT you’re saying and more HOW you say it.
Key Points To Rambling
When rambling with a girl, the most important thing to remember is that you have to flip the script:
-You are vetting her.
-You are using her for your amusement.
-She needs to qualify herself to you, not you qualifying yourself to her.
-Keep it light and bring up shallow topics.
Don’t ask “What’s your major?”
No one gives a fuck and it’s boring.
Lines and Topics To Ramble With
Now that you know the framework for rambling, here’s some lines to get your gears spinning.
You don’t have to use these exact lines, but I’ve found them to work very well and that’s based on using them for years.
“Do you come here often?”
While this is boring on the surface, it’s a great way to get clues to the type of girl she is.
If she responds with something like “Yea, I come here a lot”, or “Sometimes, but I usually go to XYZ club”, then you know she’s a party girl and is out on the town often.
If she responds with something like “Not really. I’m more of a couch and Netflix girl”, then she could be lying, but based on her body language in the venue (if she’s comfortable being out, or she looks uncomfortable), you now have an idea if she’s a party girl or not.
Note: just because a chick is out on a special occasion, but claims to not go out a lot, does NOT mean she’s not down for the D.
I’ve pulled many a library type from the club or bar, who at first glance was conservative, but I loosened her up with proper game and she was naked by the end of the night.
Let the girl disqualify herself, don’t do it automatically.
Girls say all kinds of shit, but you can’t always take it at face value.
As always get your clues from her ACTIONS, not her WORDS.
Another go to line that I use to ramble and get the conversation flowing is what I call Creating A Bubble.
This is a very powerful technique that when executed properly will create a ‘bond’, sexualize the conversation and provide some good clues on the type of chick she is.
How this works, is that I’ll spot another guy ‘flirting’ with a girl, but doing a terrible job.
Guaranteed, there’s ALWAYS at least one guy in a club or bar doing a bad job of flirting.
What I will do is motion in his direction subtly and say something like this:
“How much you want to bet he has no chance of having sex with her tonight?”
While this seems mean on the surface, it’s not, it’s just the reality of the nightlife world.
It’s a shark-fest and you will either eat or be eaten.
Secondly, girls have a ‘cruel’ streak that once you tap into it will give you a rare glimpse into the real psyche of women.
What she will usually say is something like this:
“No chance. He seems un-confident, he’s smiling too much, she keeps looking away, she’s totally not interested.”
The irony of everything she’s saying the OTHER guy isn’t, is that I am the EXACT opposite.
If you do this properly you’re essentially in a subtle manner setting her up to believe in her subconscious that YOU are the ideal type for her.
The second aspect of Creating A Bubble, is that you’re subtly dropping sex into the conversation, but it’s NOT about you having sex with her, it’s about the guy and the girl… having sex.
This gets her subconscious THINKING about sex.
Next, I’ll say something like this:
“What advice would you give him?”
At this point girls will prattle away while I nod and act interested.
I am interested, but in a relaxed and casual manner.
I’m NOT hanging on to her every word.
Remember, you’re just getting her to talk and the best way to keep a ramble going with a chick is to talk about nonsense but get her OPINION on it.
Chicks love to talk about themselves, their feelings and how they think shit should be.
Usually a girl will respond with something like this:
“Well, he should fix his style, get a stylist or something and maybe a new haircut. Actually, if he was like you he’d do good”.
This is when I smirk and say:
“You don’t say…”
She’ll then usually laugh and make a positive comment, which I will then spin into some other nonsense.
Another tip is to NOT care if the conversation fizzles out.
The harder you try to KEEP the conversation going, the more forced and unnatural it is.
Put them on the spot too.
Another one of my tried and true lines is this one:
“Tell me the craziest shit you’ve ever done.”
Her: “Well this one time in Cabo me and my friend blah blah blah”.
This tells me if she’s an adventurous type, and gives me more clues on what buttons to push with her to get her to let loose tonight.
If she can’t think of a story or is hesitant to tell one, then it’s possible she’s trying to act like a good girl because she likes you, or she simply doesn’t have any crazy stories.
I can’t tell you how many girls I’ve met who are hot, but actually quite boring.
Remember too, if it’s too loud in venue, go to the smoking patio.
Many of my lays come from getting asked for a lighter and the conversation goes from there.
If you can’t hear a girl, hold strong Frame and say so.
I’ll say something like:
“It’s too loud in here let’s go over there”.
Then I’ll take their hand and lead them to a quiet spot.
Be the leader and take charge.
These are just a few tips on the middle ground of having a conversation with a girl in a nightlife venue and how to keep it going.
I will be dropping more information on rambling in the future, but this will help get you started when you get stuck after opening a girl or getting opened.
Until next time.
Your man,
-Elijah “The Realist”
P.S Can you put a price on bettering your life? I did. Go here.
