8 Things Every Guy Should Know About Finland (And It’s Girls)

1. The biggest factor hurting the attractiveness of Finnish girls is not feminine or hipster style but obesity. 

There is a McDonald’s literally on every block, and Finnish people have taken to it wholesale.

You can only shake your head when you see a fat Finnish person waiting patiently in line to grab a burger or hot dog after a night of heavy drinking.

This is a shame since Finnish people aren’t genetically ugly.

What ends up happening is that the hot girls have tons of beta orbiters who keep them entertained and busy because no one wants a fat girl.

2. Girls are open to dating other races.

I saw quite a few brown and black guys with Finnish girlfriends.

The kicker is that these guys are speaking in Finnish, so they have integrated into the culture.

Liberal guilt is so strong in Scandinavia that girls feel ashamed to not give minority guys a fair chance.

You won’t encounter racism here.

3. Day game is NOT the best way to meet girls.

They are helpful if you approach, but they don’t really bite, especially on the street (better responses can be had in coffee shops).

Girls are not as shy as Icelanders but still significantly shyer than Americans.

I didn’t see the point in day gaming much when I found out that girls were more open at night due to self-drugging themselves with copious amounts of booze.

4. Girls are better looking than Danes and Swedes and are just a hair better than Icelanders.

I think the reason that Finnish girls do well is because there has been genetic mixing from the East.

Many girls have Slavic inspired faces that make you wonder if they’re from Russia or Latvia.

5. Americans are quite novel in Finland. 

Maybe not as much as in the Baltics or Poland, but you’ll meet a lot of people excited that you are from the States.

Even if they hate American politics, they want to meet an ambassador to a culture that they generally enjoy.

6. People are incredibly friendly. 

One time I asked for directions and when I said “Thank you” they replied back with “Thank you.”

They also seem to be a very trusting people who take things at face value.

I’m sure they get scammed a lot when they travel.

7. There are tons of East Africans, mostly from Somalia. 

The African girls seem to be aiming for a Rihanna look.

There are also many cute Asian girls.

If you get bored with Finnish girls you can try your hard at some of the more ethnic minorities.

8. The biggest flaw in Finland is that it’s really only a summer destination. 

The winters are long, cold, and dark, meaning that vagina only comes out of hibernation in the summer to get pounded by American tourists.

It doesn’t help that “summer” can be relative:

Even when I arrived in early June, I was able to experience cold weather.

Other cultural features I noticed:

Uncomfortable coffee shops that are more like food diners, a strong skateboard culture, and an obsession with sailor hats among graduating students.

Until next time.

Your man,

-Elijah “The Realist”