“Affirmations are bullshit I tell you! Bullshit!”
“They don’t work. It’s all self-help guru marketing bullshit”
“I did affirmations for two weeks and never got that Ferrari I kept telling myself I was going to get”
How many times have your heard or read comments like this?
I’d wager a few bucks almost all of you have.
Maybe you’ve even said something like that yourself.
Lend me 5 minutes of your time and I’d like to present WHY affirmations work.
Maybe it’ll change your mind… and if even one of you start doing them and see the positive change in your life… then it was worth taking the time to put this post together.
When I first started doing affirmations… I was 16 years old.
16!
What 16 year old teenager even knows what the hell affirmations are?
Generally a 16 year old boy is more concerned with the latest Grand Theft Auto video game and if he’s going to get to 3rd base with the cute girl in his history class, but I had an innate drive for something more… and to be something great.
I can’t remember where I first read about affirmation rituals, but I do remember standing in front of the mirror in the bathroom and hesitantly speaking out loud to my success.
At first I felt like an idiot.
Maybe you’ve felt the same, if you’ve tried creating an affirmation schedule.
Hopefully you didn’t stop.
First off, it’s a PRIVATE event.
It’s for YOU only.
It should be done in private and out of ear shot from anyone else.
It’s about as private as shaving your balls.
Yes, I just compared doing affirmations to shaving your balls, but I’ll bet you get the point now.
If you have a roommate or live at home with your parents and don’t feel comfortable saying them out loud because there’s always someone around, then do them in your car using your rear-view mirror or visor mirror.
Listen, if someone walks by and sees you talking out loud without a phone in your hand, they’ll just think you’re on a blue-tooth.
Don’t have a car?
Use one of those private bathrooms at gas stations.
Think I’m joking?
I’m NOT and I used them before when I didn’t have a car.
The men who truly want success as much as they want to live… will MAKE it work someway and somehow.
Don’t be overwhelmed by the ‘problem’, focus on a solution… and I promise you will eventually figure it out.
Secondly, doing affirmations is about Consistency + Faith.
You have to be consistent… with the application of affirmations.
The easy way to do this is to commit to saying them in the morning as the first thing you do when you get out of bed and the last thing you do when you go to bed at night for 21 days straight.
Following the 3 week rule for creating a new habit, it also gives you enough time to essentially ‘rewire’ your brain into focusing… on what you want it to focus on subconsciously.
Sidebar: affirmations are NOT magic.
This I want to stress to you.
They DO work, but HOW they work… is different then most people imagine.
Many people assume it means you say “I am rich!” everyday and then magically a 7 figure sum shows up in your bank account.
False.
Affirmations is like the natural supplements you take COMBINED with putting in hours of work… sweat and strain in the gym to create a great body.
You can still get in shape in the gym… WITHOUT natural supplements.
But when you combine the supplements AND the intense consistent workouts… then you get that competitive edge and create an even better body.
Where faith comes in… is that you MUST start… to believe in yourself.
Even if you doubt the hell out of yourself… and don’t feel like you’re good enough, this falls into the ‘faking it until you make it’ category.
How do you think brainwashing works?
An aspect of brainwashing… is through the use of repetition and emotion.
You’re putting yourself into a heightened state emotionally… which gets you excited about the prospect… of your inevitable success.
By repeating each affirmation… 3 times in the morning and at night… you are forcing your brain to focus on it subconsciously 24/7.
Usually brainwashing is thought of in a negative light, but in the case of positive affirmations… it’s actually good!
Think about all of the negative self-beliefs… men can pick up in the journey of life… and then start to believe them?
“I’m too short. Women don’t like short men”
“I came from poor parents, their parents are poor and therefore I’ll be poor”
“I didn’t go to college. I can’t get ahead in life without a college degree”
“Women have NEVER like me. Why would that change?”
Now think about how many times you’ve SAID out loud something just like these comments?
Hell, I’ve caught myself speaking LIES, because that’s what they are, and had to verbally cut myself off.
Now when men say LIES like these in their mind and then even out loud to themselves or others in passing, it creates a negative loop that is very hard to escape from… because it creates habits.
These bad habits create bad actions… and repeated bad actions… create a life of failure and unhappiness.
Doing affirmations will ‘rewire’ your brain… into speaking POSITIVELY and CONSTRUCTIVELY.
These repeated patterns will create a positive loop… that creates good habits… which create good actions… and these actions… will lead to success and happiness.
When you put all of your energy into becoming wealthy, becoming great with women, or ANYTHING else…
By working your ass off, working smart and NOT giving up, COMBINED with doing affirmations…
It keeps you on track to be focused, positive and aware of WHY… you are doing EXACTLY what you’re doing.
Thirdly, affirmations should be custom made.
I get emails constantly asking what affirmations to use, but I can’t say for you particularly.
One of the first steps I do with coaching clients, is help them create custom affirmations, but this is AFTER knowing who they are as a person, what their goals are… and how they are striving to achieve them.
It’s NOT incredibly difficult at all… to figure out how to do this though, so don’t be discouraged.
Know WHAT your goals are… and then make the affirmations… custom to that.
Let’s say your goal is to be the next CEO at your company.
Here’s an idea of what you would say:
“I am a GREAT CEO” (3 times)
“I AM great CEO material”
What this will do is get your brain started on figuring out HOW to help you achieve the goal of becoming your company’s next CEO.
When you’re sleeping… and you wake up early… with a fresh idea… that will get you positive attention at work… and next in line for that fat promotion, that’s your brain using the affirmations… to help you achieve that goal.
Our brains are extremely powerful, but if you don’t learn how to ‘manipulate’ it then you’re letting your most valuable resource go to waste.
If you’re still not convinced as to the power of affirmations… then I challenge you to take the 21 Day Challenge.
Here’s how it works:
-Write down your goals.
-Make custom affirmations for yourself… sticking with no less than 3 and no more than 5 statements.
Keep them short.
-Start today and for 21 days straight… say them 3 times each in the morning when you wake up… and 3 times each BEFORE you go to sleep.
Pro-Tip: in the morning get excited… and say them with energy!
At night say them calmly and with quiet conviction, because they WILL get you pumped up and it might be hard to go to sleep.
If after 21 days… you don’t feel an iota of happiness… and haven’t noticed one positive difference in your life… then I’d be downright shocked.
Remember, Consistency + Faith + Actual Work… is the KEY for affirmations to work.
If you just speak them and don’t APPLY yourself in those areas with actual work and effort, then good luck.
If you just work… and DON’T add the affirmations… you’re short changing yourself of the success and happiness… that each and every one of us can have.
I wish you all the best fucking week of your life yet.
Let’s kick some ass starting TODAY.
Until next time.
Your man,
-Elijah “The Realist”
P.S Because fucking 5’s and working at Wendy’s isn’t your REAL goal. Click here.